last long Alaska day

This is the last evening in Alaska for me as I have to head back into the fire tomorrow, the heat of Georgia in more than just temperature. Back into the fire...it is anything but that here. I haven't been able to take off any layers of clothing but one brief afternoon. Rick and I took a long walk on the beach today and the wind made my ears numb even though the sun was shining. I had made several short forays down either side of the plant alone in the first couple of days that I was here . Then I got enough sleep and alone time and began to make myself useful being Rick's sidekick. We went for a long, cold, wet walk on the tundra one night. It didn't look like night, of course, but by the time we got back it was after 11 pm. It looked for all the world to be about 6. We looked at the old graveyard that I had seen last year but more of it was visible since the plants haven't all come out yet. Wooden crosses from the 1930s would never have lasted in Georgia but many were readable. Things don't rot in the fridge. Walking out there is like walking on a sponge covered in moss and little plants. It was lonely, wild and beautiful. Rick assured me that there were no bears like last year since it was so early and no salmon were running. When we came back we went into a bunkhouse and had a nice visit with some fishermen that had just arrived to get their boats ready for the season. They had been coming here for decades, one a third generation salmon fisherman. I have met some interesting people here, all with different stories of what brought them to this place.
I had a tour of the Maverick, a boat that fishes for king crab and is on the Discovery Channel show Deadliest Catch. It was pretty neat to go around inside and see how everything works, where they eat and sleep, a personal tour by a member of the crew. I wish the kids could have been here for that.
On our walk this evening we went down the beach to an abandoned fish cannery and village. The ocean has pretty much swallowed it up. All that is left are old boilers and a few pilings and parts of buildings. We went on past it a ways to a place where a large stream comes in from the marshes and we couldn't go any farther. We were looking at the stream when I noticed some tracks on the other side. Maybe the bears don't know the salmon are late this year. We found a few more sets of tracks and i paid more attention on the way back.
I am going to miss Rick and the peacefulness of this place. I am sure that the peace will be over for a while soon when the salmon and the people to catch and process them get here in a few more days. By then I will be back in the Georgia heat, pulling weeds and planting a few more beans.

Appalachian summer-Alaskan spring

Yesterday morning I left the sultry 96 degree air of Atlanta at 7 am on Delta and woke up this morning to 46 damp, overcast degrees on the shores of a river delta near Bristol Bay, Alaska. It has been a cool spring in the mountains of Georgia but summer came in with a dry, desert-wind vengeance, drying out the grass, raising clouds of dust and pollen in the heat waves. It is more than a little disturbing to see it so dry and hot so soon. Here in Alaska, spring has been slow in coming, the herring spawning late and now the salmon run late. There is not much green here yet and the willows still have buds. I am taking a break from the chaos of the last few months and spending a week here with Rick at the plant between fish runs while Fern holds the fort at home. I wanted to come and didn't all at the same time. At 3 am on Monday when I was preparing to leave I almost chickened out as I walked Jackson around the yard and thought of all the things I hadn't thought of to tell Fern. As usual, feeling my self indispensable, I thought"I can't leave them to deal with all of this!" I got a grip, reminded myself that I could let go to someone else without the world coming to an end and, besides, I hadn't exactly been doing such a great job anyway. I was, and am, in need of rest, brain clearing, peace and quiet rest.
The month of May was once again a painful reminder of loss on the anniversary of Wallace's death, always an occasion for the devil's attacks of fear and sadness, this time with the added twist of my half-century year old mark and a feeling of helplessness in the face of the problems my children face as they reach adolescence and struggle with the damage from their past families. It was also a time for God to break through in some amazing ways for me. Through a series of interconnected events, God brought me, my brother and some friends some very good news, really the Good News of the Gospel in a new and magnified form through a book called Waking the Dead by a man named John Eldredge ( htt:p//ransomedheart.com ). It was not a string of coincidental events but a carefully orchestrated answer to our prayers from a God that comes through and shines in our darkest hour. In a nutshell the book, and several others by the same author,
reminded me that we are in a world at war, a war for our hearts. That, like in all the great stories, there is an evil force (the devil and his demons) that want revenge on God by destroying His creation and making the objects of His love (us) miserable and telling us lies about ourselves and God. When we realize what is going on, focus on The Truth about God and what He has to say about us and our relationship to Him, we see the world and ourselves in a different way. We can stop listening to the lies of the devil and begin to live as who we are, true flesh and blood of God through Jesus Christ, redeemed, adopted sons, not servants or slaves but children of God in a world that is in rebellion against our Father. We know the end of the story, we know that we win and in the mean time we live like who we are, with full confidence in that, seeing the blows that come against us as attacks of the enemy. But also attacks that are not ignored by our Father, ones that He allows because we are at war, that He strengthens us to bear and waits to see if our hearts will continue to trust Him. It has been a breath of fresh are, a ray of hope, in a long tunnel of darkness.
So here I am, in the quiet, desert place to rest for a few days. The boys are at scout camp, hopefully learning to be men in the wild. Fern is practicing patience and endurance and , along with Maria and Aaron, celebrating Alina's 6th birthday today. Cori, Nick and Peter are enjoying the beach. The beginning of a summer to remember, hopefully for good times and battles won...

May flies

The month of May sped by and I didn't post even one time so here is a catch up...Salvador's birthday, my 50th birthday, a trip to Tybee Island for a friend's daughters wedding, finishing up homeschool, Igor and Sergey finishing up their 2 months of public school, Sergey and Andrey starting spring football, the girls starting summer swimming, Raymond getting his lifeguard certification, family memorial day/birthday party, a camping trip to Tallulah River with Steve, Jenny and mama...a lot of struggles as this family plows ahead and continues to drag the baggage along behind.