being unfriended on facebook
Well, I guess blogging is sort of out of fashion now and everything is on facebook. you can only write a little snipit but the whole world is usually watching, at least the thousand or so friends that most people have. I don't have nearly that many, the majority that are not my kids being people who found me and asked to be my friend. It is interesting and I enjoy facebook more or less. A recent comment of mine in my status box brought on a whole raft of comments...it went something like "some of my children become my best friends while others unfriend me on facebook. It's a good thing i have so many of them."...most were condolences, being unfriended is a major deal on facebook..and some were encouraging words about what a great parent I am, staying strong, they'll come around and such. I was encouraged but was defriended by yet another kid yesterday, bringing the total to two. This one hasn't run away from home like the other one, still using my hot water and heat and abusing everything and everyone else here. I don't know if these malcontents will leave never to return, as they claim, or if the venom they have spewed out at me is displaced anger at their biological mothers and that one day they will calm down and see that I truly care about them. Either way, it is a process that I am going through to distance myself from their anger and minimize the damage to others that are still claiming to be part of the family. Their time may come also to erupt like volcanoes but they are still trying to make me their mother and this their family, so I try, by the Grace of God, to maintain some sanity around here. It isn't easy....


1 Comments:
Hi! I just found your blog thru Paulas. I wanted to let you know that you are certainly not alone when it comes to being naive and disillusioned by some of your kids. I went thru some of the same things over the past 2 years, culminating with my very RAD daughter running away on her 18th b-day (mid-April) and marrying a man 10 years older than her yesterday (she met him a month ago). No, she hasn't gone to jail - yet - but her lies will catch up to her. She can't even let us meet this mystery man because there is no way she wants him to see who we really are, it would totally contradict who she is telling him we are and who he thinks she is. We couldn't get along because once I saw her for who she was (and I still don't think I know everything about who she truly is) and recognized the lies for what they were, I couldn't pretend things were okay. I couldn't let the lies go, I couldn't (wouldn't?) blindly believe her any longer and that lack of trust was what she used against me time after time. She complained to everyone that I had "trust issues" - as if she was completely being victimized by me, the Mom with issues, and she had no idea why it was happening. She has a bio-brother who is 17 yrs. 2 mos (but we aren't counting down or anything) and he's headed down the same path. Expects to be taken care of like a child, gives nothing back to the family in any way, and then complains about us and comments constantly to anyone who will listen how he doesn't like the "way he's treated". Augh! My only consolation is that we adopted locally and didn't go across the country or world to help them. I hate (very strong word for me) what this has done to my bio kids, how the extreme needs of a few usurp the needs of many. Have we made a difference? I don't know, I do know that we definitely prolonged the inevitable in my dd's case. She would have been pregnant and married at 14 if she'd had her way - that seems like little consolation right now though.
I hope your health continues to improve!!
Post a Comment
<< Home